At approximately 10 pm tonight we are headed for Shikoku, the fourth largest island in Japan. At approximately 8 pm I set about producing and sculpting my "vacation beard" I find that I really enjoy myself more when I've got that badass je ne sais quoi about me. Little children run in fear, old ladies give up their hard earned subway seats and damn, I look good. So good in fact that Jennifer refuses to kiss me or even look at me, because If she did, she would be overcome with a-ni-mal luuuust. That's right, it's going to be a good week.