I have had some interesting experiences this week, and in fact this weekend i'm poised to see some japanese guys ride a tree down a mountain to test their strength and manliness, but i've never been bitten by an orangutan.

That's right folks, one of my friends here was hiking in indonesia for the march holiday and on her guided hike stumbled across several wonderful and friendly orangutans and their babies. She also stumbled right into a really pissed off misanthropic one who grabbed her leg, dragged her through the bush and laid a huge chomp on her upper thigh/ass area. The bruise is terrific. It's big, with four matching tooth marks on top and bottom. Apparently the guide saw the beast first and knew her (the orangutan's) reputation as a total asshole. He flipped and ran screaming off into the jungle leaving my friend right in the path of "Meena". Meena apparently hates tourists and so she reached out and grabbed my friend by her ankle, and chomped away.

Just for the sake of conversation? What would you do if an orangutan bit you?

Also, why don't I have any great stories like this to tell. Imagine sitting on Uncle Aaron's knee and listening to the story about the now extinct orangutan who "BIT ME ON THE ASS WITH HER GIGANTIC PEG-LIKE TEETH." I would truly be the most popular guy on the crazy uncle circuit.